Why do scientists…?

This morning, my colleague Dan sent me a hilarious map of America that shows some common stereotypes as revealed by the autocomplete feature of Google search. It was such a good idea, decided to try it for scientists, using a slight reformulation of the question†. My quick take? People seem particularly confused by the mole, and they think that mathemeticians write on glass and go crazy (maybe in that order, maybe not).

Why do scientists…
need scientific models?
use the scientific method?
classify organisms?

Why do microbiologists…
wear laboratory coats?
study parasitic worms?
autoclave?

Why do physicists…
use models?
hate chemists?
make graphs?
bash philosophy?

Why do geneticists…
use pedigrees?
use fruitflies?
use punnett squares?

Why do climate scientists…
smooth temperature data?

Why do chemists…
use the mole?
use the mole as a unit of measurement?
use chemical formulas?
work with moles?

Why do oceanographers…
use satellites?
use submersibles?
measure the salinity of seawater?

Why do theoretical physicists…
believe in god?
work?
get paid?

Why do mathematicians…
write on glass?
need the zero?
confuse Halloween with Christmas? (answer: because 31 Oct.= 25 Dec. Get it?)
go crazy?

Why do geologists…
measure soil temperature?
make thin sections?
use index fossils?

Why do paleontologists…
study fossils?
examine coprolites?

Why do marine biologists…
use microscopes?
need math?

Why do epidemiologists…
calculate incidence rates?
use rates?
calculate chi-square tests?

Why do zoologists…
Debate the relationship of mollusks?

Why DO zoologists debate the relationship of mollusks? If you know, leave a comment. If you’ve got your own you want to add to the list, feel free!

†Results using http://www.google.com

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One Response to Why do scientists…?

  1. Gwen says:

    How fun! I just did religions – sad how often the word “hate” turned up….

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